In a country where nearly 11 billion dollars is spent each year on “self improvement”, why is it we don’t appear to be improving?  Two thirds of Americans are overweight or obese.  One in every ten Americans takes an anti-depressant (one in ever four women take anti-depressants). Relationships don’t seem to be doing all that well either.  And children, oh dear, well, suffice it to say, they are not benefitting one bit from all of attempts to “self -improve”.   

We all want to feel better.  We all want to be happy.  We all want love and joy and peace, so what’s going on ? 

As a culture we have exchanged “self-care” for “self-improvement”.  The consequence of this exchange is proving to be detrimental.  You can get all the manicures and botox you want, but if your heart is broken, your heart is broken.  Losing weight is awesome, but with or without the weight, you still have yourself at the end of the day.  Medicine helps, it does.  It turns the light bulb back on in many of our brains and we need our brains.  However, it does almost nothing for the spirit.  There is no purchasable cure for the wounded self.   

You are the one you are looking for. 

I must admit I came to the table thinking I practice a great deal of self care.  I’m in therapy and well versed in emotional recovery.  I make time (most of the time) to get my hair & nails done.  I take care of my physical body.  I exercise.  Isn’t all that self care?  I kinda thought so, until I read this:

“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.

My first question was, “why did he pray?”   He was Jesus, the one so many pray to.  The one with all the answers.  The one with all the power to heal, to cure, to save.   So, what on earth was he praying about?

God, the way I hear God, whispered to my heart, “Praying isn’t what you think.  Praying is communion.  Communion is self care”.    

I became very still and extremely humbled.  He was “with” God.  He was “with” himself.  He was listening. He was sitting in the breath of Life within Him, the same breath of Life within me and you. 

As the message sunk deeper into my spirit I realized why we aren’t improving with all of our self improvement.  We have lost our core, disconnected from the source, because we are trying to “fix” the self, rather than “caring” for it. 

I still love it when my nails are done.  I’m certainly not opposed to having a fabulous outfit and a “fi” ride.  As one of my besties says, “don’t get it twisted”.   I’m not mother Teresa, whom I admire immensely by the way.   I am a real life 41 year old American mama.  I wanna look good too.  However, what I want more than looking good, is to leave a legacy for my two girls that points them in the direction of truth, love, peace, hope, happiness, and a relationship with God.  For in that they will have all they will ever need.   I want that for me too.

So, I am digging deeper into “self care”, to be “with” God, to be “with” myself, to listen, to wait, to sit in and experience the Breath of Life flowing through me day in and day out. 

Do you care for your self? Do you know yourself? Have you heard your own heart beat, your own voice?  Dive into those deep waters that you may go swimming among the miracle! 

sending you love wherever you are in the world.








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